AITA for Calling the Cops on My Brother After He Broke Into My Backyard to Let His Kids Swim?
After saying “no” to his brother’s kids using his pool, a new homeowner came home to find them swimming anyway. When he called the police, it turned the whole family against him — but was he wrong to defend his property?
OP (32M) finally achieved his dream of buying a home with a pool — something he’d saved and worked toward for over ten years. Living alone, he takes pride in maintaining his space. But his brother (35M) and sister-in-law, who have three young kids aged 4, 6, and 9, tend to leave chaos in their wake. Past visits had ended with broken furniture, food smeared on walls, and even a child peeing behind the curtains “as a joke.” Despite all that, OP had tried to stay cordial.
My brother’s kids trashed my house last time, so I said no to pool day. They showed up anyway — and then broke in while I was at work.
When his brother and sister-in-law asked to bring their kids to swim, OP declined multiple times. He offered a barbecue instead but said he wasn’t comfortable supervising children in the water. The couple showed up anyway with the kids already in swimsuits. When he refused again, they accused him of being “cold” and “bitter.” They left angry — but the next day, things escalated.
“I came home to find the gate open — and my brother’s entire family in my pool.”
His brother claimed it was “no big deal” and laughed it off. But OP wasn’t amused. He demanded they leave immediately and, when they refused, called the police. When officers arrived, his brother lied and said he’d been invited. Fortunately, OP had security footage showing them climbing over the gate. No arrests were made, but police issued a trespass warning.
“They told me I embarrassed the family by dragging the cops into it. But they broke into my yard.”
Now OP’s parents are furious, saying he should’ve handled it “privately” instead of involving law enforcement. He’s left wondering whether enforcing his boundaries went too far, or whether his family’s lack of respect left him with no choice.
🏠 The Aftermath
The trespass warning has permanently strained the family dynamic. His brother is furious, his sister-in-law is calling him “vindictive,” and his parents think he “overreacted.” Meanwhile, OP feels like the only person treating the situation seriously.
He’s now considering changing the locks, installing a taller fence, and revoking unsupervised access altogether. The guilt nags at him, but so does the thought of what could’ve happened if a child got hurt in his pool while he wasn’t home.
To him, it’s not just about water — it’s about boundaries, safety, and respect.
“If I hadn’t come home when I did, I could’ve walked into a tragedy — and still been blamed.”
OP says he’d rather deal with family drama than lawsuits or injuries. But now, holidays and family gatherings feel like walking through shark-infested waters — everyone’s smiling, but tension simmers underneath.
💭 Emotional Reflection
This situation isn’t just about pool rules — it’s about consent and entitlement. OP’s brother crossed a line by assuming family ties excused trespassing, putting both his children and OP in legal and moral jeopardy. OP’s decision to call the police wasn’t vindictive; it was protective.
Families often expect forgiveness to replace accountability, but that mindset leaves boundaries meaningless. OP had already said no multiple times — his brother’s disregard turned a family visit into a crime scene.
Reasonable people can debate tone, but not the principle: respect stops being optional when safety and property are involved.
Online readers weighed in, most taking OP’s side:
“You didn’t call the cops on family — you called them on trespassers. Big difference.”
“If a kid had drowned, you’d be the one in jail. You did exactly the right thing.”
“Blood doesn’t make you above the law. They’re lucky all they got was a warning.”
The majority agreed OP was justified, saying his brother’s carelessness was dangerous and selfish. A few thought involving police might escalate tensions permanently — but even they acknowledged he had every right to protect himself.
🌱 Final Thoughts
Boundaries don’t disappear just because someone shares your DNA. OP didn’t destroy the family — he revealed how fragile respect was to begin with. Sometimes protecting your home means being the “bad guy” in someone else’s story.
It’s not about the pool. It’s about the principle: no means no, even when it’s family.
What do you think?
Would you have left, or stayed and kept trying to make it work? Share your thoughts below 👇
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