AITA for getting an autistic kid and his family kicked off a flight after the kid pulled my hair?
A delayed, exhausted couple on a rescheduled flight face a meltdown from a nearby child — the situation escalates into a physical confrontation and the family is removed. Now the OP's wife is furious and hasn't spoken to him in days.
We were returning from a one-week vacation when our flight was canceled; after sleeping at the airport and staying a night in a hotel, our rescheduled flight was delayed again and tensions were high. While waiting and then boarding, a roughly 13-year-old boy repeatedly screamed, threw things, and eventually physically assaulted me by grabbing my hair — I asked crew to remove the family and they were escorted off the plane.
I’m a 26M who had a stressful trip home, and after a kid sitting behind me threw popcorn on me and then grabbed my hair, I insisted the family be removed — now my wife won’t talk to me.
I’m 26M and my wife is 27F. We’d already spent a night at the airport and one night in a hotel after our original flight home was canceled, so we were tired and on edge when our rescheduled flight was delayed. While waiting at the gate a boy of about 13 was disruptive—screaming, throwing his phone—and a passenger moved so the family could sit elsewhere; they ended up seated right behind me.
"Before takeoff he threw popcorn over my seat and later grabbed my hair and pulled it back—hard."
After the popcorn incident I called a flight attendant who helped clean me up. Minutes later the boy reached forward, grabbed my hair, and I reflexively removed his hand. His mother immediately screamed that I had assaulted her son and demanded I be removed. Several other passengers heard my side and backed me up, and I insisted the crew remove the family for everyone's safety and calm.
"I asked for the kid and his family to be kicked off."
Crew eventually escorted the family off the plane. The flight continued without further incident, but my wife was visibly furious — she accused me of being an asshole for not tolerating the situation and hasn't spoken to me in three days. I later remembered to mention that my wife has an autistic little brother, and she told me the child’s behavior reminded her of him.
🏠 The Aftermath
The family was removed from the aircraft and the flight departed peacefully; I, my wife, and other passengers completed the trip. At home, my wife has not spoken to me for three days and the atmosphere is tense.
The immediate outcomes: the disruptive family was escorted off the plane, other passengers were relieved, and my relationship with my wife is strained. There’s no confirmed information about what happened to that family after they left the gate.
Concrete consequences include emotional fallout at home — silence from my wife — and the moral weight of having asked for a family with a child described as autistic to be removed in a public, stressful setting.
"We landed in peace, but I’m left dealing with a silent house and second-guessing my choice."
I feel conflicted: physically being grabbed felt unacceptable, but I also recognize the family was under stress and a child’s disability can complicate how incidents should be handled.
💭 Emotional Reflection
This is a nuanced situation: being physically grabbed is a clear boundary violation and the OP had a reasonable expectation of safety on the plane, but disability and parental stress complicate how the incident could — or should — have been handled. The mother’s protective reaction and the boy’s behavior both reflect high tension on a delayed, overcrowded travel day.
A balanced read recognizes three truths: the OP was assaulted and had every right to feel unsafe; a family traveling with a neurodivergent child may struggle to manage outbursts in public; and the wife’s reaction is shaped by personal connections (her autistic little brother), which explains her anger even if others supported removal.
Reasonable people can disagree about the right move — some prioritize immediate safety and clear consequences, others emphasize de-escalation and accommodations when disabilities are involved.
How might other travelers react? Here are some likely community responses grounded in the facts:
"If someone physically grabs you on a plane, you have the right to ask crew to remove them — safety first."
"Removing a family because a child with autism acted out feels harsh — parents need support and staff should try other options before escalation."
"I get both sides — the OP was assaulted, but the wife’s silence speaks to deeper hurt; they need to talk about why this felt like a personal attack to her."
Reactions split between prioritizing personal safety, calling for greater compassion toward neurodiversity, and urging better communication between partners after a public conflict.
🌱 Final Thoughts
Physical contact crossed a line and crew removing a disruptive passenger is a standard safety response, but the presence of disability changes the moral texture of that choice and the emotional fallout. This isn't just about who was "right" on the plane — it's about how you handle the aftermath with the person you live with.
The OP and his wife are now dealing with different kinds of harm: one felt physically violated, the other felt a painful echo of family connections and empathy for a struggling child. Both reactions are understandable.
What do you think?
Would you have left, or stayed and kept trying to make it work? Share your thoughts below 👇
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