WIBTJ for Stopping My MIL from Watching My Daughter Alone?
When a grandmother’s “fun time” rule-breaking leads to a medical scare, a frustrated mother wonders if setting strict boundaries is the right call—or just overprotective parenting.
A 37-year-old mom and her husband, 31, thought they’d found a sweet routine: Grandma Jan, 65, loved taking their two-year-old daughter to the nearby playground. But what started as simple family bonding turned into a recurring problem—Jan kept ignoring their rules. From snacks to safety, she brushed off every guideline, treating her son and daughter-in-law’s boundaries as optional.
We trusted her to follow our parenting rules—but one sandbox trip proved we couldn’t anymore.
One rule in particular mattered most: no sandbox. The old, uncovered pit at the park had likely been used by animals, and her husband—who already struggled to get his mother to take him seriously—was firm about avoiding it. But during Jan’s latest outing, she ignored the rule again. Their daughter came home filthy, covered in sand, and even admitted to eating some. That night, the little girl broke out in a rash that spread across her face and neck within days.
"Our poor kid scratched herself so much in her sleep that she bled all over her pillow."
Doctors prescribed steroid cream and multiple allergy medications. Furious and frightened, the parents decided enough was enough. Her husband wanted to cut off unsupervised visits entirely, but the OP thought she should deliver the message—because, in her words, “things tend to hold more weight coming from me.” Still, she worried about how to confront her mother-in-law without deepening the family rift.
"She still sees him as a child and not a grown man with his own kids. It’s exhausting."
After several tense days and plenty of online debate, the couple sat down with Jan. To their surprise, the conversation went well. Jan apologized after seeing her granddaughter’s rash, admitted she might not have remembered the rule, and promised to respect all future boundaries. For now, visits will happen only with supervision—and no sandboxes in sight.
🏠 The Aftermath
Once they talked it through, the tension lifted. Jan seemed genuinely remorseful, and both parents laid out clear expectations moving forward.
From now on, Grandma time happens only at their home or under one of their eyes. Their daughter’s rash is slowly healing, and the peace at home feels restored—for now.
They’re sticking to their word: new parks, new rules, and renewed trust—if Jan can earn it back.
“Respecting our rules isn’t optional—it’s part of being part of our child’s life.”
It wasn’t about punishment—it was about protection. And maybe, finally, Jan understood that.
💭 Emotional Reflection
This story underscores a common family tension: when grandparents see themselves as experts rather than supporters. Love doesn’t excuse boundary-breaking—especially when it risks a child’s health.
The OP and her husband weren’t overreacting; they were protecting their daughter and their peace of mind. It’s not about control—it’s about trust, consistency, and respect between generations.
Reasonable people can disagree on parenting styles, but the line is crossed when someone repeatedly disregards parental authority. In this case, love had to come with limits.
Redditors shared plenty of support and similar experiences:
“NTA. If she can’t respect your rules, she doesn’t get unsupervised time. It’s that simple.”
“This isn’t about sand—it’s about trust. Good on you for protecting your kid.”
“Boundaries are love in action. You handled this better than most would’ve.”
Most commenters sided firmly with the parents, agreeing that supervised visits were the safest—and most respectful—solution for everyone involved.
🌱 Final Thoughts
Parenting means setting limits, even when it feels uncomfortable. Enforcing them with family doesn’t make you controlling—it makes you responsible.
When trust is rebuilt through respect, everyone wins—especially the little ones caught in the middle.
What do you think?
Would you have left, or stayed and kept trying to make it work? Share your thoughts below 👇
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