AITA For Disappearing After Finding Out My Boyfriend Of 7 Years Cheated On Me?
After discovering her long-term boyfriend’s betrayal, one woman plans a complete disappearance from his life — but she wonders if she’s missing anything before walking away for good.
I (27F) just found out my boyfriend (29M) of seven years cheated on me. He went to our home state to visit his family for the weekend — something he’s been doing about once a month lately, saying it’s because his grandparents are old and miss him. I never thought much of it… until this morning.
A mutual friend sent me a screenshot from Snapchat — my boyfriend’s location showed him at his parents’ house, but there was also a girl’s Bitmoji there. It wasn’t his mom or sister. To make things worse, his parents (who weirdly also have Snapchat) weren’t home at the time. He hadn’t mentioned meeting anyone else that day. When I tried to call him, he didn’t pick up, and then his location disappeared.
That same friend told me that my boyfriend had been telling everyone back home that we broke up four months ago — and he’d made him keep it secret because he was “waiting for the right time to tell me.” Apparently, his parents think he’s moving home when our lease ends. The friend only told me because he walked in on my boyfriend and that girl hooking up earlier that morning.
“He Used Our Photos On Tinder — And Covered My Face”
Still in shock, I reached out to another old friend from my hometown — and before I could even say much, she asked, “Why is your boyfriend on Tinder?” She sent me screenshots of his profile. He was using pictures I took of him. Even worse, one photo was of us together, except he’d cropped me out and written in his bio: “This could be you.”
My stomach dropped. We had just gone to Italy a month ago to celebrate our seven-year anniversary. I can’t believe that while I thought we were making memories, he was living a lie. His entire family apparently thinks we’ve been broken up for months.
“He used the photos I took of him to find someone new — while I was still calling him mine.”
Leaving Without a Trace
He texted me that he’s on his flight home — five hours away. I’m not waiting. My best friend came over, and together we’re packing up all my things. I’m leaving, taking our dog, and going to stay with her for now.
Financially, I’m safe. We already had separate bank accounts, and the joint account barely has anything. I make more than he does, so he can keep it. I emailed the leasing office about breaking our lease early and completed the termination form for our domestic partnership — I’ll drop it off at the county office tomorrow. I’ve also contacted HR to remove him from my health insurance immediately.
The only thing I can’t decide is what to do with our photo albums. I don’t want to see them ever again, but I also don’t want him to keep them as some twisted trophy of what we had. Every picture feels like proof of how blind I was.
“I’m done being the person who gives second chances — he’ll wake up to nothing but silence.”
What Comes Next
I don’t want revenge — I just want peace. I’m going to disappear from his life completely. No dramatic confrontation, no closure conversation. Just gone. I want him to come home to an empty apartment and realize what he’s lost.
I’ve covered the logistics — now I’m just trying to cover my heart. Part of me still can’t believe the person I built a life with could lie so easily. I’m not sure if I’ll ever trust anyone that deeply again, but I know one thing: I deserve better than being someone’s backup plan.
“Sometimes the best closure is no contact at all.”
Typical reader reactions:
“NTA. You’re protecting your peace — and that’s powerful.”
“Take the photos, burn them, start over. You’re doing everything right.”
“He deserves the silence. Let him come home to the emptiness he created.”
🌱 Final Thoughts
When betrayal shatters a relationship, sometimes the only way to heal is to walk away completely. OP’s decision to leave without confrontation is both heartbreaking and empowering — proof that silence can speak louder than any goodbye.
What would you do?
Would you confront him for closure, or vanish and never look back? Share your thoughts below 👇
![Me [35 M] with my wife [29F] of five years, wants a divorce after I requested a paternity test.](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5WUFPRBe77g6Qkr2SvfYtFnTRGVzmALILg8Rn7NER8CBTetFYIll2ffRl6-A7HBVPRXSYCrdq5s40KzmruT_4EqZkpNyLmGPTEjtVf10JCm0mtHucsqHkLZRSObreK0cfxmvdmnTFfjg1HEWnZYlGh79MguWfROzyMZD7pLHzH8rczUQj5g7v1vncYOCV/w72-h72-p-k-no-nu/RS82.jpeg)
 boyfriend (29M) of 7 years cheated on me. I'm going to disappear from his life. Is there anything I'm missing?){kind=link}
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