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AITJ for refusing to go on the family Christmas trip after my dad backed out of our agreement

AITA for Refusing to Settle for a Road Trip Instead of Japan After Meeting My Dad's Conditions?

At 14, my parents wanted me to give up gaming for "real skills." After meeting my dad's conditions for a dream trip to Japan, he now wants to change plans to a cheaper US road trip, leaving me feeling betrayed.

When I was 14, my parents wanted me to quit gaming and "focus on real skills." We made a deal. If I got a job, kept my grades above a 3.5 GPA, and saved $3000 by the time I turned 18, my dad would take me and a friend on a week-long trip to Japan for Christmas senior year.

I worked hard, got a job at 15, maintained a 3.7 GPA, and saved almost $5k. Last week, my dad revealed the Japan trip would cost $8k and suggested a cheaper US road trip instead.

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I told him I'm not going. That he completely betrayed me and I spent 4 years working toward this specific thing.

I confronted him, but he insisted on the change. I felt hurt and deceived by the sudden alteration of our agreement.

Now my whole family is mad at me for "ruining Christmas" because apparently he'd already planned this Seattle trip and got an Airbnb.

I stood my ground, refusing to compromise on a trip that didn't align with the original agreement, facing backlash from my family for my decision.

🏠 The Aftermath

Despite the tension, I chose not to go on the substituted trip and stayed home instead.

My dad proceeded with the Seattle trip while I reflected on the broken promise and my family's disappointment.

The fallout included strained family dynamics and a sense of betrayal and unmet expectations.

It became clear that the trust and effort put into the original agreement were disregarded, leading to resentment and hurt feelings.

Mixed emotions arose as I navigated the aftermath, grappling with a shattered dream and fractured family relationships.

💭 Emotional Reflection

The situation highlighted a significant breakdown in communication and understanding between my dad and me, resulting in conflicting expectations and unmet promises.

Looking back, I realized the importance of clear agreements and mutual respect in family dynamics, emphasizing the need for open dialogue to prevent misunderstandings.

Navigating the aftermath prompted me to consider the complexities of family relationships and the impact of broken promises on trust and emotional well-being.


Reactions to the situation varied, with many sympathizing with my perspective and the significance of the broken promise:

Your dad made a promise and should have honored it. Changing plans last minute was unfair to you.
It's understandable why you felt betrayed. Promises, especially those made over years, should be respected.
Your disappointment is valid. Trust and communication are crucial in such situations, and your feelings are justified.

The responses echoed a shared sentiment of disappointment and frustration over the broken promise and the resulting emotional impact on family dynamics.


🌱 Final Thoughts

Reflecting on the situation, it's evident that clear communication and honoring commitments are essential in maintaining trust and fulfilling expectations within family relationships.

The dilemma underscores the importance of setting realistic expectations and following through on promises to avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

What do you think?
Would you have left, or stayed and kept trying to make it work? Share your thoughts below 👇


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